I hit my year anniversary of working at my job today. This year has seriously gone by so fast looking back at it... but I know when I was going through it, some parts felt like forever.
As I was approaching this year mark, I've become more contemplative about "home." I know I've addressed this a bit before in at least a few other blog posts, but since I've been thinking about it, I've decided to become even more contemplative and write about it. And so you get to read about it! :-)
Home. I'm not entirely sure where my home is. My parents don't live where I grew up anymore. Plus, they're going to be moving once again next summer (this time possibly to another country) for three years, so wherever they end up will obviously not be home. And Provo isn't home anymore, but Boise isn't quite yet home, either.
Boise is starting to feel a bit more like home, though. Just the fact that I've officially been here for over a year now helps with that feeling. But a big turning point for me was visiting Provo the last few times. As much as I always love seeing my old roommates and occasionally a couple of other friends, it's also been hard. I think it's sometimes easy to forget that when you leave a place, the people there keep living their lives. So when I go back, there are inside jokes I don't know. Experiences I haven't shared. Relationships that I'm not a part of. Which is fine, because that's life. I've continued to live my life separately, as well. But that doesn't make it any easier to come to that realization.
But Boise still doesn't feel completely like home. Part of me still feels like Provo is. Which, when you think about it, does make sense. I lived in Provo longer than I lived anywhere else in my life (yes... I did move around quite a bit growing up). But as I thought about it more, it doesn't make complete sense. For the majority of the time that I was there, I was so excited to leave Provo as soon as I graduated. But that changed once I really made Provo my home.
What made Provo become home? It was when I finally stopped running and moving from place to place every 4 or 8 months. I told people that I moved a lot because I liked new experiences and meeting new people, which was true. But deep down, the whole truth was that I was scared. I was scared of staying in one place for a long enough amount of time to build deeper friendships, because I had deeper friendships in the past that didn't end well. So I didn't get close to people. I didn't let myself get vulnerable. I was great at making superficial relationships and then moving on... to a new apartment complex, a new ward, and new superficial friends.
This isn't to say that I didn't make friends in those first 4 years in Provo. I definitely did. But how many do I stay in real contact with? Very few... even people I was roommates with. I can seriously count those deeper friendships on one hand (possibly just a couple of fingers).
But then one evening in late June 2011, I made the fateful decision to move in with some girls from the ward I was currently in. These girls made Provo become home to me. It wasn't easy at first. For the next couple of months before I officially moved in, I was freaking out quite a bit (internally, of course). I had never before lived with people that I knew before I moved in with them. Up until that point, I had never pushed myself to make friendships become deeper, though a few had developed naturally. But I knew I was supposed to move in with them, and whether I wanted to or not, I opened up. I developed deep friendships with those girls. Shared parts of myself I normally kept hidden. They pushed me and I grew in ways I never would have if I hadn't chosen to live with them.
So why isn't Boise home? I haven't taken those same risks. I've grown and stretched a ton at work due to my responsibilities there. I'm better at standing up for myself and others. I'm better at making decisions (well...sometimes). I'm better at being blunt when I have to be. I'm better at prioritizing and getting stuff done. I'm better at being part of a team to accomplish the work we've been charged with. But I haven't grown as much personally because I haven't opened up. Because I haven't let myself be vulnerable. Because I haven't risked.
So where is home? Home is where the heart is... but it's also where you make it. Homes aren't made magically. To have someplace become a home, it requires work. When I evaluate myself honestly, I haven't done enough work to make Boise become home. I need to start taking the steps to change that, because I know I'm happier when I live in a place I can call home. So even though I'm sometimes tempted to throw in the towel and move away (to another new place, job, or opportunity...especially when there are jobs I hear about in cool places that I could likely get), I'll keep pushing forward... at least for another year until I get licensed. (Having to deal with transferring hours to yet another state would be a PAIN). And maybe by that point I won't want to leave, because it's truly become home.
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Saturday, October 12, 2013
General Conference- October 2013
I know I probably am taking longer than I should to post about General Conference. But I had to take some time to gather my thoughts.
The older I get, the faster conference seems to go. Granted, part of it is getting faster (they seem to consistently end the sessions early now, but when I was growing up, I remember it going right up to the time, or even over). But I know a big part of it going faster is the fact that I'm appreciating it more and find myself drinking up everything that I can. I find myself looking forward to the counsel God is providing to us through His leaders.
I went in to conference with some specific questions. The past few times I did that, I got very specific answers. This time, I still definitely got answers, but they were more vague... though I guess the General Relief Society Meeting was a bit more specific, as one of my questions was about how I can better understand the temple and covenants, and most of the meeting consisted of talks focusing on covenants (see here, here, and here).
It's always interesting to me to see what themes come out of conference, even (or especially) when I'm not looking for them. I did expect the big theme of missionary work, and that was definitely there (see here, here, and here). But one theme that really jumped out at me was one of enduring through trials and pushing forward. Maybe I saw that theme more than was actually there, but I wasn't particularly looking for it, so I don't think that's the case. I know there were past conferences where this is the theme I would've craved at that point in my life. But right now, things are going alright for me. But I loved all of the talks about trials regardless, and I know I'm going to go back to them and re-read them during the future hard times that I will face. (So for my reference, some of the talks to re-read during those times are this, this, this, and this... in addition to all of my current go-to talks)
My favorite of all of them, though, was Elder Holland's talk (he is typically a favorite of mine, if you couldn't tell from me linking to several of his other talks during the course of this blog). But this talk in particular was great for me, because, as I put on Facebook, "As a therapist, I want to give it to every client I work with who has depression, as well as every person I come across who doesn't understand that mental illnesses are real. As a human being, I loved the reminder that through the Atonement all will eventually be made right. I'm so grateful for living prophets and these inspired messages."
I know it wasn't a perfect message, as people experience depression differently. But it was such a relief to hear it talked about. It really hurts my heart when people who don't understand depression or other mental illnesses tell others that they should just "pray more" or "choose to be happy." And this seems to be an especially big response from people in the church due to some of the culture, which makes it even harder. But you can't simply pray away depression. You can't choose to be happy when you're depressed any more than you can choose to not have diabetes if you are diagnosed. It was so wonderful to hear the validation that an apostle of the Lord provided. I have so many friends and family members and clients who struggle with various mental illnesses and I hate the stigma attached to it...even though, if we're being completely honest, I sometimes perpetrate that stigma. Which is made even worse by the fact that I've even dealt with it some myself. (Not something I'm super open about due to that fun vulnerability thing I've discussed before... but that is a blog post for another day.)
I know there is so much that I didn't catch from conference and I'm excited to take Elder Hale's counsel and continue to study and learn from it (including the talks from the Priesthood Session, as I haven't taken the time to read those yet). I am so blessed to have the gospel of Jesus Christ in my life and to be able to receive guidance from my Father in Heaven through His prophets and leaders. I know I need to show more appreciation of that, especially by sharing it... and I guess me blogging about it is one small way I can do that.
What was your reaction to General Conference?
The older I get, the faster conference seems to go. Granted, part of it is getting faster (they seem to consistently end the sessions early now, but when I was growing up, I remember it going right up to the time, or even over). But I know a big part of it going faster is the fact that I'm appreciating it more and find myself drinking up everything that I can. I find myself looking forward to the counsel God is providing to us through His leaders.
I went in to conference with some specific questions. The past few times I did that, I got very specific answers. This time, I still definitely got answers, but they were more vague... though I guess the General Relief Society Meeting was a bit more specific, as one of my questions was about how I can better understand the temple and covenants, and most of the meeting consisted of talks focusing on covenants (see here, here, and here).
It's always interesting to me to see what themes come out of conference, even (or especially) when I'm not looking for them. I did expect the big theme of missionary work, and that was definitely there (see here, here, and here). But one theme that really jumped out at me was one of enduring through trials and pushing forward. Maybe I saw that theme more than was actually there, but I wasn't particularly looking for it, so I don't think that's the case. I know there were past conferences where this is the theme I would've craved at that point in my life. But right now, things are going alright for me. But I loved all of the talks about trials regardless, and I know I'm going to go back to them and re-read them during the future hard times that I will face. (So for my reference, some of the talks to re-read during those times are this, this, this, and this... in addition to all of my current go-to talks)
My favorite of all of them, though, was Elder Holland's talk (he is typically a favorite of mine, if you couldn't tell from me linking to several of his other talks during the course of this blog). But this talk in particular was great for me, because, as I put on Facebook, "As a therapist, I want to give it to every client I work with who has depression, as well as every person I come across who doesn't understand that mental illnesses are real. As a human being, I loved the reminder that through the Atonement all will eventually be made right. I'm so grateful for living prophets and these inspired messages."
I know it wasn't a perfect message, as people experience depression differently. But it was such a relief to hear it talked about. It really hurts my heart when people who don't understand depression or other mental illnesses tell others that they should just "pray more" or "choose to be happy." And this seems to be an especially big response from people in the church due to some of the culture, which makes it even harder. But you can't simply pray away depression. You can't choose to be happy when you're depressed any more than you can choose to not have diabetes if you are diagnosed. It was so wonderful to hear the validation that an apostle of the Lord provided. I have so many friends and family members and clients who struggle with various mental illnesses and I hate the stigma attached to it...even though, if we're being completely honest, I sometimes perpetrate that stigma. Which is made even worse by the fact that I've even dealt with it some myself. (Not something I'm super open about due to that fun vulnerability thing I've discussed before... but that is a blog post for another day.)
I know there is so much that I didn't catch from conference and I'm excited to take Elder Hale's counsel and continue to study and learn from it (including the talks from the Priesthood Session, as I haven't taken the time to read those yet). I am so blessed to have the gospel of Jesus Christ in my life and to be able to receive guidance from my Father in Heaven through His prophets and leaders. I know I need to show more appreciation of that, especially by sharing it... and I guess me blogging about it is one small way I can do that.
What was your reaction to General Conference?
Saturday, August 31, 2013
Receiving my endowment
Yesterday, I was able to go the Provo temple and receive my endowment. It was such a great experience, though a lot to take in. But I am determined to keep going back and keep learning and growing. I love temples!
It was so neat to be surrounded by friends and family. And, in an extra nice touch, it was the 16th anniversary of me being baptized and confirmed. (Hence the collage of pictures of me on my baptism day, and of me after receiving my endowment.)
It was so neat to be surrounded by friends and family. And, in an extra nice touch, it was the 16th anniversary of me being baptized and confirmed. (Hence the collage of pictures of me on my baptism day, and of me after receiving my endowment.)
I could write a lot about the experience, but I won't. I feel like I've been preparing to receive my endowment for a long time (and I guess I have). I am glad I took the time to prepare that I did. I am truly am grateful that I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and for the opportunity I have to worship in the temples of God and to become closer to Him.
If you have questions about "Mormons" or want to know more about temples, feel free to ask me. Or visit http://mormon.org/.
Friday, August 30, 2013
Birthday!
I turned 24 yesterday. Weird. But it was seriously a fantastic day.
I drove down to Brigham City after work on Wednesday to stay at my grandparents' house. My mom and Jenna were already there, so that was great. I was pretty tired, but didn't sleep the best, which was unfortunate. But my mom made me a delicious breakfast in bed, which was awesome. (It was always tradition growing up that you'd get breakfast in bed on your birthday. But I haven't had that since I was a senior in high school, as I've never been home on my birthday.) I had some of my grandma's fresh peaches from her garden, biscuits with sausage gravy, bacon, and German pancakes. Delicious.
Jenna and I then went to both the Bountiful and Salt Lake temples to do baptisms. I had never been to the Bountiful temple before, so that was cool. The baptistry reminded me a lot of the baptistry at Mount Timpanogas. (Which made more sense later, when I found out they were dedicated only about a year and a half apart.) And I'd done baptisms in the Salt Lake temple once before, but I love it. Such a beautiful and unique baptistry. After doing baptisms in those two temples, Jenna and I stopped at the Meds in Motion pharmacy in Salt Lake that my dad is co-owner of my and cousin in the pharmacist. Got to see my mom, dad, and a couple of cousins there. (If you're in the area and need a great pharmacy, use them! They're awesome!) Jenna and I split a Firehouse Sub for lunch, as you apparently get a free one on your birthday if you show an ID. Sweet.
After that, Jenna and I got mani/pedis. For her birthday back in March, I said I'd treat her to one and this was the first time I've seen her since then, so we did that. It was fun. Then we hung out at my old apartment briefly.
Then we went to Tucano's as a family for dinner, which was wonderful. It was the first time we'd been together as an entire immediate family since Christmas, and the first time the whole immediate family has been together on my birthday in 9 years, so that was great. And, of course, the food was delicious. The waiters were fantastic, too.
We hung out at Mike's briefly, then Jenna and I went to the Provo temple and did baptisms there with our cousin Lee. It was very neat for me to go and do baptisms one more time in the Provo baptistry on a Thursday night. Four of "my" temple workers were still there, working that shift (there has been a lot of change in the workers in the past 10 months), and it was nice catching up with them. Two of them are even going to try and come to the temple for when I receive my endowment today.
After baptisms, I opened presents and spent more time with family. And my cousin Danielle had made a chocolate pecan pie that she shared. (Are you seeing the theme of delicious food on my birthday? Because there totally was one.)
And I can't forget about the inundation of birthday wishes from dear family and friends throughout the day. I feel so loved.
As I said in my Facebook status update (yes, I am about to quote myself), "If birthdays are any indication of how good the next year is going to be, I'm about to have my best year yet!" I seriously hope that is true. :-)
I drove down to Brigham City after work on Wednesday to stay at my grandparents' house. My mom and Jenna were already there, so that was great. I was pretty tired, but didn't sleep the best, which was unfortunate. But my mom made me a delicious breakfast in bed, which was awesome. (It was always tradition growing up that you'd get breakfast in bed on your birthday. But I haven't had that since I was a senior in high school, as I've never been home on my birthday.) I had some of my grandma's fresh peaches from her garden, biscuits with sausage gravy, bacon, and German pancakes. Delicious.
Jenna and I then went to both the Bountiful and Salt Lake temples to do baptisms. I had never been to the Bountiful temple before, so that was cool. The baptistry reminded me a lot of the baptistry at Mount Timpanogas. (Which made more sense later, when I found out they were dedicated only about a year and a half apart.) And I'd done baptisms in the Salt Lake temple once before, but I love it. Such a beautiful and unique baptistry. After doing baptisms in those two temples, Jenna and I stopped at the Meds in Motion pharmacy in Salt Lake that my dad is co-owner of my and cousin in the pharmacist. Got to see my mom, dad, and a couple of cousins there. (If you're in the area and need a great pharmacy, use them! They're awesome!) Jenna and I split a Firehouse Sub for lunch, as you apparently get a free one on your birthday if you show an ID. Sweet.
After that, Jenna and I got mani/pedis. For her birthday back in March, I said I'd treat her to one and this was the first time I've seen her since then, so we did that. It was fun. Then we hung out at my old apartment briefly.
Then we went to Tucano's as a family for dinner, which was wonderful. It was the first time we'd been together as an entire immediate family since Christmas, and the first time the whole immediate family has been together on my birthday in 9 years, so that was great. And, of course, the food was delicious. The waiters were fantastic, too.
We hung out at Mike's briefly, then Jenna and I went to the Provo temple and did baptisms there with our cousin Lee. It was very neat for me to go and do baptisms one more time in the Provo baptistry on a Thursday night. Four of "my" temple workers were still there, working that shift (there has been a lot of change in the workers in the past 10 months), and it was nice catching up with them. Two of them are even going to try and come to the temple for when I receive my endowment today.
After baptisms, I opened presents and spent more time with family. And my cousin Danielle had made a chocolate pecan pie that she shared. (Are you seeing the theme of delicious food on my birthday? Because there totally was one.)
And I can't forget about the inundation of birthday wishes from dear family and friends throughout the day. I feel so loved.
As I said in my Facebook status update (yes, I am about to quote myself), "If birthdays are any indication of how good the next year is going to be, I'm about to have my best year yet!" I seriously hope that is true. :-)
Thursday, July 11, 2013
Washington D.C. Trip
One thing I love about being a young single adult is being a lot more free to travel. I don't have a ton of vacation time, but I am starting to make some money... and I like spending my money on experiences (like travel and entertainment). I've always wanted to go to Washington D.C. (I even put it on my 101 list), and I realized that if I wanted to pull it off, I might as well do it over a holiday, so I wouldn't have to use as much vacation time. One of my friends (Sarah June) now lives in D.C. and it worked out perfectly to go and visit her over Independence Day. I took 3 days off work and was gone for 6 days, thanks to the holiday and the weekend. (And side note... I finished my month of no eating out for my 101 list just in time for the trip. Good plan, self.) And this is the highlights of the fantastic trip.
Tuesday
I left work a bit early to head to the airport. My flight was delayed, but I was still able to make my connection in Denver because that flight was also delayed. I got into Dulles rather late, but Sarah June picked me up and we had a happy reunion. She took me to her cute townhouse and we collapsed.
Wednesday
Thursday
Tuesday
I left work a bit early to head to the airport. My flight was delayed, but I was still able to make my connection in Denver because that flight was also delayed. I got into Dulles rather late, but Sarah June picked me up and we had a happy reunion. She took me to her cute townhouse and we collapsed.
Wednesday
Sarah June woke me up and said that we could go to baptisms at the Washington D.C. Temple (something we had mentioned the night before), but we had to leave in 20 minutes. We got ready fast. We got to the temple and it was stunning. I've seen pictures, but they certainly don't do it justice (in my opinion). And it was really neat, because they aren't using the separate baptismal entrance, so we got to walk by a lot of other parts of the temple, including a beautiful mural of the Second Coming. We met up with Sarah June's friend, Lexie. I got to do a few family names (1 from Sarah June's family, and 2 from Lexie's family), as well as some temple names. After we did the baptisms and confirmations, Sarah June and I quickly took some pictures outside, and went to the visitor's center, where we changed out of our church dress. We headed straight to the Capitol, where we got a basically private tour, because I had requested tickets through my Representative, so Sarah June and I got a private tour with the intern. I was glad not to feel like I was being herded, like I saw with other big tour groups. The tour was neat, and we even got a free ticket to sit in the Senate chamber.
After the Capitol, we went to the Air and Space Museum, which was really cool. For dinner, we ate at the cafe at the National Museum of the American Indian and it was delicious. Then we went to a dress rehearsal of A Capitol Fourth. Sarah June's cousin (Marcus) joined us. We had a really good spot (very far back, but it was up on a ledge, and we could see the stage still), but then they made us move to a spot where we couldn't really see the stage. But they did have JumboTrons and we could hear great. It was fun to do that and not have to go when it is insanely crowded on the Fourth.
After the Capitol, we went to the Air and Space Museum, which was really cool. For dinner, we ate at the cafe at the National Museum of the American Indian and it was delicious. Then we went to a dress rehearsal of A Capitol Fourth. Sarah June's cousin (Marcus) joined us. We had a really good spot (very far back, but it was up on a ledge, and we could see the stage still), but then they made us move to a spot where we couldn't really see the stage. But they did have JumboTrons and we could hear great. It was fun to do that and not have to go when it is insanely crowded on the Fourth.
Thursday
Slept in longer than we planned, but it was quite necessary. We parked at the Pentagon and took the Metro to the parade to see Sarah June's cousin (Russ) and his wife (Kaela) dancing in the parade with their swing group. But we ended up missing them, which was disappointing. We stayed for a bit, but then we ended up hitting the Old Post Office, The Smithsonian Castle, the Folklife Festival (where we got some Indian food for lunch), The Museum of Natural History, National Museum of American History, the Washington Monument, and the Jefferson Memorial. We hung out with some of Sarah June's family at the Jefferson for a few hours before watching the fireworks from there.
Friday
Got up early and headed downtown to take a DC Ducks tour. As we waited for our tour, we saw the outside of the National Postal Museum (they weren't open for tours yet) and checked out the Memorial to Japanese-American Patriotism in World War II. (Quite the mouthful.) The memorial was powerful in the symbolism. Then we went on the duck tour, on our vehicle named "Lucky Duck." Our boat wasn't all the way full, so we got to spread out a bit, which was nice. The tour was awesome and it was nice to see a lot of the highlights in a really fun way. We even got to go out on the Potomac and see tons of planes fly into the Reagan Airport and I got to briefly steer it when we were on the Potomac. After the duck tour, we went to the Supreme Court and Library of Congress. The Library of Congress was an absolutely stunning building. I'd figure out a way to get a Library card if I lived in the area so I could explore it more thoroughly. (They also have the best gift shop, in my opinion... though they didn't have any smashed pennies,which was a letdown.) For lunch, we went to Busboys and Poets, which was yummy and had a fun vibe. Then we went to Mount Vernon, which was way better than I expected. We had to rush through the museum so we could get to our tour, and we were literally the last people through the house for the tour. And that meant we shut the whole place down and didn't get to explore the rest of the grounds like we would have liked. But it was seriously beautiful. If I lived in the area, I would get a year pass and go all the time. And I have SO much more respect for the Washingtons after that. And I think I had a decent amount of respect to begin with. For dinner, I was able to meet up with some friends from sophomore year (Liz and Rachel). I haven't seen for a few years due to them going on missions and whatnot, so it was good catching up with them.
Saturday
Sarah June had errands to run, so I explored DC a bit on my own. I went to the National Archives and looked through the exhibits, and also waited in line to see the documents in the Rotunda (The Declaration of Independence, the Constitution of the United States, and the Bill of Rights). And I got to see one of the originals of the Magna Carta. It was so cool to see these pieces of history. After that, I met up with Rachel and we stopped by the Ford Theater and I got a picture, but I didn't have tickets, so we kept walking. We ended up at the American Art Museum and Portrait Gallery and saw some exhibits there. Then Rachel left and I went over to the Hirshhorn and explored a bit on my own. But I was exhausted and then went back to Sarah June's, where I relaxed a bit. Then we had pizza and went to a YSA party.
Sunday
Slept in, as Sarah June's ward didn't meet until 11:30am. That was lovely. The ward (which, by the way, is probably the biggest YSA ward I've ever seen) meets in an old office building that has been renovated to be a church. Definitely a very unique church building. I was able to spend a bit more time with Rachel, since she's also in Sarah June's ward. And I was able to see two other friends from Provo who are also randomly in that ward. That was fun. I saw Chris (a guy I was an RA with) and Sarah (a girl who was on my floor when I was an RA). They're both out in DC working. I love random reunions!
After church, we went to Arlington National Cemetery. It was ridiculously hot and humid, which was rough. But the cemetery was so incredibly peaceful. We got to see the Women in Military exhibit, JFK's grave, and watch the changing of the guard at The Tomb of the Unknowns. The amount of gravestones was actually quite astounding. I've seen pictures before, but I didn't fully understand how HUGE it was until I saw it in person. Sarah June and I rested at home for a bit and had some great conversations because the humidity really took it out of us. Then, as it was getting dark, a few of us met up with Russ and Kaela. Kaela used to be a volunteer park ranger, and she knows lots of cool facts about the monuments and the history behind them. We went to FDR, MLK, Vietnam, Lincoln, Korea, 56 Signers, and WWII. It was so cool seeing them at night with our own personal tour guide.
Monday
Sarah June dropped me off at the Metro before she headed off to work. I met up with Russ, and he stored my luggage as I explored DC a bit more. I wandered over to the White House so I could get a picture by it (they aren't currently doing tours) I continued on to the Ford's Theatre and The Petersen House (where Lincoln died). I then went back to the Holocaust Museum. After that, I went to the Washington Monument to get a few more stamps in my National Parks Passport from the monuments that I saw on Sunday. I reunited with Russ and got my luggage, hopped on the Metro, and got to the airport. (Hooray for easy-to-navigate mass transit that I feel so sophisticated when I use!) And then got to the airport and my flight was delayed, so I did some work things and played around on the rather slow internet. I landed in Boise around midnight and got to bed rather late, so I was definitely tired at work the next day.
I still feel tired from my trip and it's been a bit hard to get back in the groove of work, but D.C. was truly a great vacation and just good for my soul. The whole time I was in D.C., I told myself I could never live there because of the high cost of living and the crowds, but maybe I could. I already find myself missing it and I'd definitely love to visit again. And who knows what the future could bring...? :-)
Friday
Got up early and headed downtown to take a DC Ducks tour. As we waited for our tour, we saw the outside of the National Postal Museum (they weren't open for tours yet) and checked out the Memorial to Japanese-American Patriotism in World War II. (Quite the mouthful.) The memorial was powerful in the symbolism. Then we went on the duck tour, on our vehicle named "Lucky Duck." Our boat wasn't all the way full, so we got to spread out a bit, which was nice. The tour was awesome and it was nice to see a lot of the highlights in a really fun way. We even got to go out on the Potomac and see tons of planes fly into the Reagan Airport and I got to briefly steer it when we were on the Potomac. After the duck tour, we went to the Supreme Court and Library of Congress. The Library of Congress was an absolutely stunning building. I'd figure out a way to get a Library card if I lived in the area so I could explore it more thoroughly. (They also have the best gift shop, in my opinion... though they didn't have any smashed pennies,which was a letdown.) For lunch, we went to Busboys and Poets, which was yummy and had a fun vibe. Then we went to Mount Vernon, which was way better than I expected. We had to rush through the museum so we could get to our tour, and we were literally the last people through the house for the tour. And that meant we shut the whole place down and didn't get to explore the rest of the grounds like we would have liked. But it was seriously beautiful. If I lived in the area, I would get a year pass and go all the time. And I have SO much more respect for the Washingtons after that. And I think I had a decent amount of respect to begin with. For dinner, I was able to meet up with some friends from sophomore year (Liz and Rachel). I haven't seen for a few years due to them going on missions and whatnot, so it was good catching up with them.
Sarah June had errands to run, so I explored DC a bit on my own. I went to the National Archives and looked through the exhibits, and also waited in line to see the documents in the Rotunda (The Declaration of Independence, the Constitution of the United States, and the Bill of Rights). And I got to see one of the originals of the Magna Carta. It was so cool to see these pieces of history. After that, I met up with Rachel and we stopped by the Ford Theater and I got a picture, but I didn't have tickets, so we kept walking. We ended up at the American Art Museum and Portrait Gallery and saw some exhibits there. Then Rachel left and I went over to the Hirshhorn and explored a bit on my own. But I was exhausted and then went back to Sarah June's, where I relaxed a bit. Then we had pizza and went to a YSA party.
Sunday
Slept in, as Sarah June's ward didn't meet until 11:30am. That was lovely. The ward (which, by the way, is probably the biggest YSA ward I've ever seen) meets in an old office building that has been renovated to be a church. Definitely a very unique church building. I was able to spend a bit more time with Rachel, since she's also in Sarah June's ward. And I was able to see two other friends from Provo who are also randomly in that ward. That was fun. I saw Chris (a guy I was an RA with) and Sarah (a girl who was on my floor when I was an RA). They're both out in DC working. I love random reunions!
After church, we went to Arlington National Cemetery. It was ridiculously hot and humid, which was rough. But the cemetery was so incredibly peaceful. We got to see the Women in Military exhibit, JFK's grave, and watch the changing of the guard at The Tomb of the Unknowns. The amount of gravestones was actually quite astounding. I've seen pictures before, but I didn't fully understand how HUGE it was until I saw it in person. Sarah June and I rested at home for a bit and had some great conversations because the humidity really took it out of us. Then, as it was getting dark, a few of us met up with Russ and Kaela. Kaela used to be a volunteer park ranger, and she knows lots of cool facts about the monuments and the history behind them. We went to FDR, MLK, Vietnam, Lincoln, Korea, 56 Signers, and WWII. It was so cool seeing them at night with our own personal tour guide.
Monday
Sarah June dropped me off at the Metro before she headed off to work. I met up with Russ, and he stored my luggage as I explored DC a bit more. I wandered over to the White House so I could get a picture by it (they aren't currently doing tours) I continued on to the Ford's Theatre and The Petersen House (where Lincoln died). I then went back to the Holocaust Museum. After that, I went to the Washington Monument to get a few more stamps in my National Parks Passport from the monuments that I saw on Sunday. I reunited with Russ and got my luggage, hopped on the Metro, and got to the airport. (Hooray for easy-to-navigate mass transit that I feel so sophisticated when I use!) And then got to the airport and my flight was delayed, so I did some work things and played around on the rather slow internet. I landed in Boise around midnight and got to bed rather late, so I was definitely tired at work the next day.
Sunday, June 23, 2013
Dates, 5K, Movies, and Other Updates
I feel like this blog has just become my 101 list update blog. And you pretty much only get an update once a month. Sorry if that's getting boring. But here we go anyways.
I was finally able to check off "Go on a date with at least 10 different boys from 10 different states." I was a bit afraid that I wasn't going to be able to do it once I moved to Boise. I had 9/10 dates in Provo, and it's a bit harder to find non-Idahoans in Boise than it was to find non-Utahans in Provo. But I got set up on a blind date this week and was rather happy to find out that the guy was from a state that I hadn't been on a date with yet. So I ended up going on a date with guys from California, Louisiana, Idaho, Oregon, Missouri, Texas, Virginia, Colorado, Utah, and Maryland. I kind of wish I had kept track of where guys I went on dates were from before my 101 list. Most of the guys I've been on dates from were from more "common" states, but I'm pretty sure that I went on a date with a guy from Alaska during my freshman year of college. I may have to go back to that journal and verify that. And then maybe create a sticker chart for it, because sticker charts are awesome and motivating. (And it's always nice to be able to get a sticker even if the date wasn't all that great.)
Yesterday, I ran the Color Me Rad race, so I was able to check off "run a 5K" from my list. Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure that they lied on the length. I think it was only somewhere between 2 and 2.5 miles. If you say something is a 5K, make it a 5K! But I did run the whole thing (and by run, I mean I didn't walk any of it). But since it was advertised as a 5K and I prepared for a 5K, I'm counting it. I may try to run a real one later, though. Anyways, here's a before/after picture for you amusement. (I'm a bit sad that I didn't get more color on those awesome white capris I found at Deseret Industries. I bought them specifically for the race. But now I think I'll just save them for a future tye-dye project.)
Also yesterday, I finished my goal to, "Watch 50 movies I haven't seen before (recommended either by friends or critics)." (Which, if we're being honest, ended up just being watching 50 movies. Because I'm sure one of my friends or some critic somewhere liked it.) The list of movies, for those who are interested (don't judge me if you do choose to look over this list):
Spellbound; The Muppets; The Vow; Forever Strong; Paycheck; Mission: Impossible—Ghost Protocal; In Time; Iron Man; Iron Man 2; Thor; Sliding Doors; Captain America; Court Jester; The Avengers; Lockout; The Three Musketeers; Mirror, Mirror; The Lucky One; Shakespeare in Love (edited); Jurassic Park; Heart and Souls; Nora’s Will (edited); Pretty Woman (edited); Snow White and the Huntsman; Total Recall; Brave; Premium Rush; Stranger than Fiction; Breaking Dawn: Part 1; Breaking Dawn: Part 2; Wreck-it Ralph; Pitch Perfect; Gulliver’s Travels; The Perks of Being a Wallflower; Get Smart; Saint; Oz; Wit; Jack the Giant Slayer; Lincoln; The Host; Torn Curtain; Persuasion; Iron Man 3; The Amazing Spiderman; The Croods: Adventures in Babysitting; Warm Bodies; 42; Oblivion.
In other news, I won stuff this week! I won a t-shirt from the Color Me Rad race because I changed my profile picture on Facebook to their logo and commented on a post and they selected me as a winner. And I got a $10 gift card in the mail to Google Play for a Samsung contest that I forgot that I entered. Score.
I was also feeling liked I needed a change, so I did a slight makeover. And by makeover, I mean I got a haircut. (And they added a gloss that was supposed to make my hair look richer... I don't know if I can tell a difference on that part.) It ended up being shorter than I expected (I always seem to forget how much my hair naturally curls up), and I'm still adjusting to it. But I think I like it. The picture on the left was how I looked when I left the salon. The picture on the right was of me today, without having styled my hair at all. Which, if we're being honest, is how I'll be looking most of the time. I think I like this particular cut better when it's straight, but I don't own a straightener. Or a curling iron, for that matter. And if we're being completely honest, I don't have the sort of motivation, time, and energy to style my hair. (Because in the war between hair and sleep, sleep always wins.)
I was finally able to check off "Go on a date with at least 10 different boys from 10 different states." I was a bit afraid that I wasn't going to be able to do it once I moved to Boise. I had 9/10 dates in Provo, and it's a bit harder to find non-Idahoans in Boise than it was to find non-Utahans in Provo. But I got set up on a blind date this week and was rather happy to find out that the guy was from a state that I hadn't been on a date with yet. So I ended up going on a date with guys from California, Louisiana, Idaho, Oregon, Missouri, Texas, Virginia, Colorado, Utah, and Maryland. I kind of wish I had kept track of where guys I went on dates were from before my 101 list. Most of the guys I've been on dates from were from more "common" states, but I'm pretty sure that I went on a date with a guy from Alaska during my freshman year of college. I may have to go back to that journal and verify that. And then maybe create a sticker chart for it, because sticker charts are awesome and motivating. (And it's always nice to be able to get a sticker even if the date wasn't all that great.)
Yesterday, I ran the Color Me Rad race, so I was able to check off "run a 5K" from my list. Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure that they lied on the length. I think it was only somewhere between 2 and 2.5 miles. If you say something is a 5K, make it a 5K! But I did run the whole thing (and by run, I mean I didn't walk any of it). But since it was advertised as a 5K and I prepared for a 5K, I'm counting it. I may try to run a real one later, though. Anyways, here's a before/after picture for you amusement. (I'm a bit sad that I didn't get more color on those awesome white capris I found at Deseret Industries. I bought them specifically for the race. But now I think I'll just save them for a future tye-dye project.)Also yesterday, I finished my goal to, "Watch 50 movies I haven't seen before (recommended either by friends or critics)." (Which, if we're being honest, ended up just being watching 50 movies. Because I'm sure one of my friends or some critic somewhere liked it.) The list of movies, for those who are interested (don't judge me if you do choose to look over this list):
Spellbound; The Muppets; The Vow; Forever Strong; Paycheck; Mission: Impossible—Ghost Protocal; In Time; Iron Man; Iron Man 2; Thor; Sliding Doors; Captain America; Court Jester; The Avengers; Lockout; The Three Musketeers; Mirror, Mirror; The Lucky One; Shakespeare in Love (edited); Jurassic Park; Heart and Souls; Nora’s Will (edited); Pretty Woman (edited); Snow White and the Huntsman; Total Recall; Brave; Premium Rush; Stranger than Fiction; Breaking Dawn: Part 1; Breaking Dawn: Part 2; Wreck-it Ralph; Pitch Perfect; Gulliver’s Travels; The Perks of Being a Wallflower; Get Smart; Saint; Oz; Wit; Jack the Giant Slayer; Lincoln; The Host; Torn Curtain; Persuasion; Iron Man 3; The Amazing Spiderman; The Croods: Adventures in Babysitting; Warm Bodies; 42; Oblivion.
In other news, I won stuff this week! I won a t-shirt from the Color Me Rad race because I changed my profile picture on Facebook to their logo and commented on a post and they selected me as a winner. And I got a $10 gift card in the mail to Google Play for a Samsung contest that I forgot that I entered. Score.
I was also feeling liked I needed a change, so I did a slight makeover. And by makeover, I mean I got a haircut. (And they added a gloss that was supposed to make my hair look richer... I don't know if I can tell a difference on that part.) It ended up being shorter than I expected (I always seem to forget how much my hair naturally curls up), and I'm still adjusting to it. But I think I like it. The picture on the left was how I looked when I left the salon. The picture on the right was of me today, without having styled my hair at all. Which, if we're being honest, is how I'll be looking most of the time. I think I like this particular cut better when it's straight, but I don't own a straightener. Or a curling iron, for that matter. And if we're being completely honest, I don't have the sort of motivation, time, and energy to style my hair. (Because in the war between hair and sleep, sleep always wins.)
And I guess it's time to get a bit more real. Sundays are hard for me. Probably one my least favorite days of the week. Which is ridiculous, because Sundays are supposed to be wonderful and restful and uplifting. But I've overall really struggled with Sundays since coming to Boise. On top of just knowing that the weekend is almost over and that I have to go back to work the next day, I miss my ward and friends in Provo. I feel so much pressure from my calling whenever I go to church. I feel disconnected. I don't always feel the Spirit. More often than not, I seem to have to force myself to go to church and then force myself to stay. I know I need to change my attitude and do some things differently, but it is hard, especially when Boise does still feel temporary for some reason. But there were some tender mercies today. Like the girl sitting next to me in Sacrament meeting asking to borrow my program, and giving it back to me with a sweet note telling me I was beautiful. That did lift my spirit for a bit. But by the time I went to the chapel for the The Work of Salvation: Worldwide Leadership Training Broadcast (again, forcing myself to stay), I was feeling down. That feeling only intensified when they kept talking about missions and showing the MTC choir and video clips showing full-time missionaries. When I was making the decision last summer about what to do in my life, for the first time ever, I considered serving a full-time mission. I even met with my bishop to discuss starting my papers. But I wasn't getting a feeling like it was definitely what I should do and I decided to pursue starting my career instead. Shortly thereafter, things fell into place for my job and the move to Boise. I've been very blessed. But two days after I made the decision to take the job, move, and start my career, the historic announcement to lower the missionary age came. Missionary work started being on everybody's minds. But I moved forward with my decision. There have been many times since then that I wondered if I made the right choice. Besides just wondering if I should have stayed in Provo and taken the other job I was offered, I also kept wondering if I should I have chosen to serve a mission. This feeling has only intensified as I read updates from my friends on missions every week, see my friends home from their missions talk to their investigators on Facebook and hear stories about how their missions has blessed their lives, listen to talks about missionaries in General Conference, and then this broadcast. I was really wondering if I made a mistake in deciding to stay. Am I being selfish in choosing to not go? And, to be honest, I sometimes feel a bit of social pressure like I should have gone. Not coming from the church itself... they've made it very clear that it's up to the individual sister. But with I almost feel like there's some peer pressure from all the girls going and from the guys who now seem to expect girls to serve missions. Maybe that's all in my head, but sometimes it does seem like the sisters going on missions look down on those of us who haven chosen differently. And on some dates, I've been asked if I served a mission and the implied response seems to be a judgmental, "Why not?" when I tell them I haven't. I do worry about my future children not getting as much as they can from me because I didn't have the experience of serving a mission. I even worry about myself not growing the way that I should... I know how much I learned and grew from being an EFY counselor last summer. That was like a mini-mission in a way. A mission would be that times a thousand and I could only see it blessing me and my future family and whoever I come in contact with. I know those aren't great reasons to serve a mission, but that's how I was feeling for the first half hour or so of the broadcast. But then, they had an amazing musical number with a video attached. Click here to see the broadcast, and the song/video starts around 37:45 or so. For those of you who choose not to watch it (though you really should), it's a choir singing, "I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go." Which is traditionally, a missionary song, at least in my mind. But the video depicted a family going about in their daily lives, touching those around them and being member missionaries in their own way.
That video was an answer to a prayer I didn't even realize I had. And I know I will likely still have some doubts about whether I'm supposed to be here. (I seem to have doubts a lot... I'm trying to replace my fear with faith, though. It's a work in progress.) But for now, for me, the call to "Go Where You Want Me to Go" is more like "I'll Stay Where You Want Me to Stay." I need to bloom where I'm planted. I'm in Boise for a reason and I need to make the most of it and touch the lives of those I meet here, and not wonder "what if." I'm trying to stay close to the Lord and if I do, He will not lead me astray.
Sunday, June 2, 2013
A month of weekend travels
One of my 101 List goals was to "Travel somewhere every weekend for a month." I just finished my month of weekend travels.
The first weekend, I met my roommate (Karen) at a campsite just past Idaho City in the Boise National Forest to spend the night. It was beautiful and we were right by the Payette River. Got there just in time for dinner. Just hung out and read for most of the evening. Then we had breakfast the next morning before I headed back to Boise, and Karen continued to explore the area.
The next weekend, Karen and I went to visit her aunt and uncle in Gooding and spent Friday night with them. The next day, we visited Little City of the Rocks and Hagerman Fossil Beds. The Little City of the Rocks was quite pretty and it was fun exploring. The Hagerman Fossil Beds was a bit disappointing, but at least I got a stamp in my National Parks Passport!
The third weekend of adventures took a big group of us to the Oregon Coast for Memorial Day weekend, where we stayed in a house that Karen's extended family owns. I've never been to the Oregon Coast before and it was absolutely beautiful and so peaceful. I already want to go back. The weekend was full spending time with friends (old and new), laughing, visiting fun places, eating, and reading. We went to the beach multiple times (including going tidepooling early one morning), visited the Lewis and Clark National Historical Park, Salt Works, and the Tillamook Cheese factory, went to cute little shops in little beach towns, toured a lighthouse, went on some hikes, played games, and just hung out. Such a great weekend. I miss it. Visiting there, even for a weekend, was the first time that I thought that maybe I'd be able to live in a rural place... just because it was so beautiful. My pictures certainly don't do it justice.
And this weekend (the final weekend), Karen and another friend and I headed to Craters of the Moon, where we met up with one of Karen's co-workers and that co-worker's parents. We camped Friday night and then explored Saturday morning. We hung out and relaxed Saturday afternoon (I got quite a bit of reading done), before heading to Gooding to spend the night with Karen's aunt and uncle.
It's definitely been quite the month of fun and adventures. It's been fun to have things to look forward to on the weekends. It helps me get through some of the harder days at work. It's also helped me to realize how much longer weekends seem to last when you are actually doing things. (They seem to go by much faster when you wake up at 11am and then read or watch TV for the majority of the day.) I'm excited to have a few relaxing weekends coming up, though I am definitely planning on going on some more adventures soon.
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